The Feminine Woman – Embracing Biblical Femininity is Beautiful

Femininity… what does it mean? What does it mean to be a feminine woman?

When you hear the word “feminine” many different things may come to your mind. You may imagine an aesthetic of lace or the color pink, or certain activities such as picking flowers or dancing in a ball gown. Maybe women that you know come to mind, or various female public figures you admire.

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There are many ideas on what could be considered feminine… But as christians we must define a feminine woman with a biblical worldview. What does it mean to be a christian feminine woman in today’s culture, and why should we embrace our femininity?

In a basic sense, I believe femininity is the expression of our essence in being a woman. And if we are going to define and embrace what is feminine, we must first understand that men and women are different. Femininity is the opposite of masculinity. Both are wonderful & needed in this world.

What the Bible calls a feminine woman

The Bible is the true source for us to find out what is feminine. Scripture speaks much about how a virtuous woman conducts herself as well as guidance for living out her purpose. What the Bible says about femininity is the ultimate authority on the topic. To be a true feminine woman would be to live out the godly characteristics described in the Bible.

Some of the virtues and roles God lists as desirable for women (& wives) are to be gentle, quiet spirited, submissive to their husbands, modest, loving their children, wise, hard-working, caring for the home, generous, kind…. this is what we should strive for as women. We also find that most of what Scripture has to say about a godly woman emphasizes good works & what’s on the inside rather than outward appearance.

A list of Scripture references

If you want to look at some Scriptures that are written specifically to or about women, here is a good place to start with this short list of references. I would encourage you to dig into these texts, within their contexts, and study them for yourself! Or get with your husband, a leader in your church, or a godly mentor and look at them together to find out what they mean! To be truly feminine is to “put on” the good works God has laid out for women to walk in.

• Genesis 2: 18 – 25 – a helper fit for him
• Proverbs 31: 10 – 31 – an excellent wife
• Titus 2:3-5 -teach what is good
• 1 Corinthians 11: 2 – 16 creation order
• Ephesians 5: 22 – 24 a wife’s role in marriage
• 1 Peter 3: 1 – 6 godly conduct of a wife
• 1 Timothy 2: 9 – 14 adorned with good works

Of course, this is not all of them. There are countless proverbs pertaining to women and stories of faithful women throughout the Bible!

Women are different than men

In the beginning, God created mankind as male AND female (Genesis 1:27.)

As christians, our ultimate purpose in life is to glorify God. And as a woman, my ultimate purpose in life is to glorify God specifically as a woman.

God’s design and purpose for men and women is the same in many ways. Ultimately, we are both called to worship Christ as Lord and Savior and be conformed into his image (Romans 8:29.) Both genders are to carry out the mission to spread the good news of the gospel and be a light in a lost world.

Many fundamental ways men and women live out the christian faith will be the same, and yet we see clearly starting from Genesis chapter 2 and throughout Scripture that there is a distinction in purpose and function between male and female. For example, the man (Adam) was created first, was put in the garden to work and received the first commands from God. The woman (Eve) was created second and was brought to Adam to fill the need for him to have a helper for the mission. Then, God commissioned them together to be fruitful & multiply, and subdue the earth. (Gen. 1:28)

This is God’s perfect design, and how glorious it is! The human race was not complete without the woman. For the first time after all God created, he declared that something was NOT good and it was that man was alone before the woman was created (Genesis 2:18.)

So this must mean that women are distinct from men, and that God made women uniquely different from men. Otherwise he could have stopped after creating Adam. One race, two genders. We must seek to glorify God in the specific way in which he designed us as feminine women.

A woman’s nature

We can also learn what is feminine just by observing how woman was designed by our Creator. It is clear from basic anatomy that women were designed differently than men -from our hormones, how we’re built, to the way our instincts are wired.

One way this is true is a woman’s instinct to nurture. A woman tends to be more nurturing than a man, with an innate motherly desire to care for the physical and comfort needs of others even if she never has children of her own. Think of how women generally make up the majority of nurses tenderly caring for patients, or elementary school teachers gently guiding little children.

And then we have the glorious role of mother. The way a woman’s body is designed to carry a baby in the womb and nourish her baby with her body after he’s born is most extraordinary. Only the woman’s body can do this, and children grow and thrive in the care of a nurturing mother. This is a beautiful thing to look forward to!

Sometimes though, we as flawed humans do not always operate within our nature in a fallen world. Our feminine qualities can be suppressed and even replaced with masculine tendencies. It can be hard for us as women to cultivate the nurturing side of ourselves, for example, when we are bombarded with societal pressure to be and do everything according to the world’s standards of success. We live in a world where women are expected to behave and perform like men, even abandoning their feminine roles. This is really not to anyone’s advantage, including women.

Why should we embrace our femininity?

If you are a woman, then God made you feminine. We are most fulfilled when we live to glorify God according to how He designed us. Feminists would have us believe that in order to be happy we must be able to be and do all that men are, but this is not true. What a dull society we would live in if men and women were the same!

This also makes such a difference in the family unit. A family needs a masculine father and a feminine mother. It simply doesn’t function well if the woman is resisting her God-given role and nature. If she is lured away and taken captive by the feminist lies to “free” herself from the confines of biblical femininity, she will be miserable and her family will suffer for it. And if the family is broken down, society will ultimately fail. Without Christ, this is the result. But thanks be to God that he is changing lives and families daily by the work of His Spirit because of what Christ accomplished on the cross.

A family doesn’t need two dads in the same way a family doesn’t need a dad and a mom who is trying to operate the same way as dad. It just doesn’t work! Femininity is needed and we should enjoy it and embrace it!

I want to highly recommend the book Eve in Exile: The Restoration of Femininity by Rebekah Merkle. I recently listened to it on audible, and I have to say it’s the best book I’ve read about biblical femininity! There’s also a documentary based on the book that gives the highlights in a visual format. It was excellently done, with a well balanced approach! I’ve never felt more inspired and empowered to embrace my femininity.

Displaying our femininity in how we dress

Those virtues listed in the scriptures above should be our primary aim when pursuing femininity. But there’s also something beautiful and elegant about a woman who is dressed like a lady on the outside.

You don’t have to love dresses, ruffles & pastel colors in order to be feminine. (I do love those things, but it’s just personal style/preference.) But there’s something to be said about putting forth effort to look feminine in our appearance. It is a good thing when a woman looks like a woman.

A cultural statement

When I go out in public, I want there to be a clear distinction that I am a woman and that I embrace my femininity. This also makes such a statement in our culture today that tries to blur gender lines. Having a feminine, modest appearance can be just a small way to be a light for truth in a confused generation. This also lines up with the command in Deuteronomy 22:5 not to dress like the opposite sex.

Even if some guy clothes and girl clothes have similarities (like pants & ball caps for example) there are ways you can style & accessorize in order to make yourself set apart as a feminine woman.

I love what Kelli from “Home with Kelli” on YouTube has to say on this topic! She shares her journey of embracing feminine dress when it didn’t come naturally to her as an athlete. So inspiring to me! You can watch that video HERE.

You’d be surprised at what all you can find at thrift stores as far as clothing goes! I also love to get feminine modest dresses at this online shop (code RACHEL15 for a 15% off discount) so many great options!

I’ve noticed personally that when I dress more feminine, I feel more feminine. Therefore, I act more feminine. However we dress though, we must remember that it’s on the inside that matters most. How we appear on the outside must be an overflow of our femininity on the inside.

A feminine woman for the masculine man

I also love to please my husband in how I look & embrace my femininity. I feel much more romantic toward him when I dress as a feminine woman and embrace my feminine qualities.

Masculine men don’t need their wives to be just like them or to compete with them. What a man truly needs is a feminine woman – someone to bring something different than what he already possesses. Femininity and masculinity compliment one another!

Whether married or looking for a spouse, I also think that biblical femininity in a woman can often bring out the godly masculine traits in a man. The wife shows reverent submission, the husband leads with joy. The woman shows admiration & trust, the man provides and protects. It’s so beautiful and wonderful!

We can only be truly feminine if we are changed from the inside out

As mentioned before, worldly ideologies can sometimes cause us not to be the feminine women we are called to be. But honestly, our own sin nature is often what causes us to rebel against the way we were designed. To truly be able to glorify God as a feminine woman is to be changed from the inside out by the work of the Holy Spirit. Sin must be put to death, and this is only possible because of the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross. Praise God that he made a way!

You may not naturally have a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God (as mentioned in 1 Peter 3:4.) You may be quite the opposite (one of my many struggles!) The qualities of the Proverbs 31 woman may seem way out of your comfort zone. Or you may not reverence your husband as directed in Ephesians chapter 5 like you should. You may resist the idea of keeping your home as mentioned in Titus 2.

BUT the great news is that by the power of the Holy Spirit, you can change your mindset, develop these biblical characteristics, and ultimately reflect more of the image of Christ as a woman. When we lay our lives down, putting aside our own will and submitting to God’s will, we become more like Christ and live out our calling. And this is actually the way we become most satisfied in life and have purpose.

I truly love being a woman. And continuing to learn what it means to be a biblical feminine woman is one of the best things we can pursue.

Want to find joy homemaking?

Homemaking is such a joyful part of being a feminine woman. There’s always so much to learn, and we can get so much satisfaction from cultivating beauty & goodness in our homes for the glory of God.

If you desire to grow as the “keeper of your home” as mentioned in Titus 2 but you’re afraid of it being drab and boring, don’t! Not only can domestic endeavors be challenging and fulfilling, you can also create beauty around your homemaking tasks.

I’ve created a fun list of 25 Ways to Romanticize Your Life as a Homemaker for the romantic inside you -these are just small ways you can start to enjoy your homemaking tasks & take delight in them! You can get that free printable HERE

You can read the full blog post here: Romanticizing Life as a Homemaker – How to Enjoy Homemaking

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Until next time,